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How Red Lipstick Has Led Me To Truly Trust My Intuition

How Red Lipstick Has Led Me To Truly Trust My Intuition

Guest Post by: Katarzyna Stomska

Hey. I am Kat, and I am so grateful to be able to share my journey to discovering a unusual power of no other than RED LIPSTICK.

What unusual power you ask? Let me explain....

As a narcissistic abuse survivor I was NEVER allowed to wear makeup. Every attempt to purchase any beauty products or being gifted something, were met with unbearable mental abuse, constant tears and often fear of surviving to the next day.

I might have never been a huge make up fan, but like most survivors I longed to look beautiful and needed something to cover up bruising….

In 2012 I finally gained the courage to escape the covert narcissist, who not only was the father of my children, but also my husband at the time

Living over 5 years in a survival mode, I felt lost, depressed and traumatized beyond anything I have ever known.

I had to learn not only how to embrace my new found freedom, but also to love and accept myself unconditionally.

I have tried countless ways to stop being scared of being on my own - reading loads of books and I remember the very first time I was able to go shopping for items so many of us take for granted and believe are mundane.

That shopping trip included getting the brightest red lipstick I could find at the time

Little did I know that this red lipstick will change my life forever.

I remember being scared to look in the mirror, crying, remembering all the phrases being thrown at me until all I could do was pass out and sleep

These phrases included- “You are worthless," “You are ugly," “without me no one will ever love You."

I began to write on the only mirror I had - until there was literally no space and then spend hours cleaning it until it was sparkling- so I could use it again.

Somehow it ended up being therapeutic and I have noticed changes in the way I reacted to anything triggering related to the covert narcissist and his actions.

It wasn't until 2017, 5 years later, when I was finally ready to look in the mirror and see the woman I always longed to be. A woman who no longer felt like a victim but a warrior and survivor. A woman who started to pay herself compliments and who slowly began to love herself a little bit more.

At this point You may wonder when the Intuition comes in and how it became connected to the red lipstick?<